I’m dating a married woman - Vanguard News Nigeria
Niger has the world's highest number of child marriages. A total of 28 per . However, very few women have actually asserted this right to date. Get relationship tips, flirt lessons, dating advice and more. Read today's Pulse Nigeria. Pulse TV 5 complaints married women usually have about marriage. Traditional marriage in Nigeria involves four main parts namely, (1) Introduction, ( 2) Family requirement, (3) Taking a date and (4) Bride price payment and.
Precolonial societies often distinguished nobles and Islamic scholars from commoners and slaves; merchants from farmers herders, and fishers; and warriors from producers. Urbanism, Architecture, and the Use of Space Despite growing migration to the towns and the recent growth of the capital city, Niger remains overwhelmingly rural. Outside the capital city, architecture and the use of space reflect traditional regional and sedentarized-nomadic differences.
In both rural and urban areas, architecture also reflects social stratification. Throughout much of the rural south, west, and east, there are adobe mud houses and a few concrete tin-roofed houses of functionaries and teachers. In much of the rural north, there are semi-sedentarized nomadic camps with tents of various materials grass, animal hides interspersed with adobe mud houses.
Tents have portable walls, which are removed and transported for nomadic migration with herds.
New clothes and cash: social media fuels Niger 'bride price' controversy
The greater degree of sedentarization in a community, the more common the adobe mud houses. In semi-nomadic Tuareg communities, women build and own the tent and men build and own the adobe house. In the tent, there is gender-based symbolism: As houses become more common as a result of sedentarization, there are corresponding changes in property relations between the sexes.
In many communities, mosques are surrounded by the homes of traditionally aristocratic, chiefly, and Islamic scholar families. Homes of families of traditionally lower or ambiguous status are located farther from the mosque and its surrounding neighborhood. Another important feature in the countryside is the widespread opposition between the settled community village or camp and the wild. There is the idea of the settled community as a human habitation and center of civilization, as opposed to the unsettled, wild areas surrounding it that are believed to be inhabited by spirits.
People are believed to be vulnerable to the influence of the spirits of the wild on certain specified occasions, such as during life transitions or during travel. The spirits of the "wild" spaces must be controlled before people engage in activities that alter their domain.
In Niamey, most families' houses also tend to be of the standard adobe mud type, usually rented, although there is variation according to nationality and socioeconomic class. Many Europeans in Niamey inhabit buildings locally called "villas," that are made of concrete and often have running water, electricity, and air-conditioning.
In Niamey there have been increasing gaps between the standard of living, income, and comfort of most Nigeriens and that of many foreign residents. Europeans and a few well-to-do Africans tend to reside in neighborhoods high on a hill, called the Plateau, and near the river in European-colonial concrete villas and Western-style apartments. Also on the Plateau are government offices, ministries, the presidential palace, and the presidential guard as well as the offices of many international aid agencies and embassies.
Food and Economy Food in Daily Life. Millet, sorghum, and beans are the major food crops, and peanuts and cotton are the major cash crops. Rice is grown along the banks of the Niger River. Millet is the basic daily staple for most rural people in all regions, followed in importance by corn, sorghum, rice, macaroni, beans, cowpeas, cassava, and wheat dishes such as couscous.
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Rice is a "status" food that is served at rites of passage, holidays, and other special occasions. Millet dishes vary in style but usually are prepared as a "paste" or stiff cooked porridge dough and covered with a vegetable sauce that occasionally contains small pieces of meat. However, most meat is served apart from sauces, grilled and eaten on the side on special occasions.
In the northern Air region, millet often is also served with goat's or camel's milk. Also popular in the north is cheese made from goat's milk. Food taboos include a nationwide avoidance of pork and specific taboos observed by different groups. Food Customs at Ceremonial Occasions. Important ceremonial occasions at which special meals Despite growing migration to towns, Niger remains overwhelmingly rural.
Ritual animal sacrifice and slaughter and communal consumption of meat are important at those holidays. Extended families, often residing in a few nearby household clusters in rural areas, normally consume the meat together after it is slaughtered by an Islamic scholar or the male household head.
Men, women, and children usually eat apart. Other dishes include "high-status" foods such as rice, macaroni, and couscous with richer sauces. There are also liquid grain beverages resembling beers. Among the Tuareg, a special beverage called eghajira or eghale consists of pounded millet, goat cheese, and crushed dates blended with water and served from elaborately carved decorated wooden ladles.
The northern zone is devoted primarily to pastoral nomadism involving camels, cattle, sheep, and goats. In the Air Massif there are pockets of oasis gardens that require constant irrigation. The southern Sahelian zone is devoted to agropastoralism, which at the fringe of the Sudanian zone becomes essentially agriculture. Despite efforts by the government to increase agricultural production and the development of uranium mining, the gross national product has declined sharply.
Niger has been plagued by ecological disaster, economic crises, and political uncertainty. After the drought of —, the government attempted to make the country self-sufficient in food production. This was achieved inbut another drought in caused food shortages.
Austerity measures imposed by the World Bank and the International Monetary Fund further weakened the economy, bringing shortages and unemployment. In more arid regions, livestock production dominates with the raising of cattle, camels, sheep, and goats. There is fishing on the Niger River and Lake Chad, with dried fish sold widely. There are permanent markets in the major towns and market days in rural communities.
Much commerce is conducted by truck and traditional camel caravan trade between Niger and Nigeria. Goods in local markets include fresh produce such as fruits and vegetables, dried river fish, canned goods from Algeria, household supplies and tools and cloth from as far away as China, spices, perfumes, and traditional medicines from Algeria, Nigeria, and Mecca.
Many Haussa and Zarma-Songhai women cook and sell snack foods by the side of the road. Some women manufacture knitted items and engage in leatherwork. Mining accounts for nearly 20 percent of the gross domestic product. Uranium exports are a major source of national income. Uranium mines opened inand output reached a peak in Declining demand and falling world prices then led to a reduction in output. It is estimated that Niger has 10 percent of the world's uranium reserves.
Coal is used to generate electricity for the mining towns. Other important minerals include tin-bearing cassiterite, iron, tin, coal, phosphates, gold, and salt.
Manufacturing consists mainly of food processing, textile production, and leather tanning. Tourism has become important. The traditional caravan trade, while it has diminished in importance, is still conducted by Tuareg men.
The men go east to Bilma to trade millet for salt and dates and then go south to Kano and other parts of Nigeria to trade the salt and dates for household tools, luxury goods such as cloth and spices, and more millet. In rural communities, many work roles still correspond to traditional patterns of age, gender, and social class. The major cultural and ethnic groups are characterized by a marked degree of specialization in labor that derives from their complex precolonial hierarchical, stratified social organization.
Those social orders featured hereditary, endogamous occupational groupings with traditionally performed distinct roles as well as relationships of fictive kinship and mutual dependence.
In the past, slavery was important. Age-based roles cut across this system in the form of fictive kinship and apprenticeship. Because of their joking relationships with persons of aristocratic origin, smith-artisans and oral historians griots often are referred to metaphorically as their "cousins" or "little sisters brothers.
Social strata with varying tributary and servile origins formerly served aristocratic or "noble" patrons, and even today in many rural areas, families of aristocratic origins are still attached to their inherited smiths and griots.
However, prestigious descent no longer always corresponds to socio-economic prosperity, and many families of noble origin now have difficulty supporting their client families.
In the towns, many of these "client-patron" relationships are breaking down. Particularly important today are arts and crafts specialists. Among the Haussa, there are metalworkers, leatherworkers, griots, and other specialized hereditary strata.
Among the Tuareg, smith-artisans in the countryside manufacture jewelry, weapons, and household, gardening, and herding tools for nobles and serve as ritual specialists, providing music at nobles' name days, weddings, and other festivals as well as acting as go-betweens for marriage arrangements and as political intermediaries for traditional chiefs.
In the towns, many Tuareg smith-artisans are active in the market trade, adapting their traditional silver, wood, and leather works for European tourist and African functionary tastes and sometimes working in gold. Griots and smith-artisans exert much informal power through their critical social commentary. Also important among all groups are Koranic or Islamic scholars, often called maraboutswho serve as religious scholars and scribes and, in the countryside, combine legal, medical, and religious professions.
Social Stratification Classes and Castes.
I’m dating a married woman
New classes are emerging, particularly in the towns. While marriages still tend to be endogamous in the countryside, there is increasing intermarriage in the towns and monetization has disrupted many old client—patron rights and obligations.
Functionaries may be of diverse Granaries in a Niger village. Some cultural and ethnic groups have not benefitted from economic development, although the government has attempted to narrow these gaps. After the Tuareg separatist rebellion ended, more Tuareg were integrated into the army, given functionary posts in semi-autonomous northern regions, and admitted to the university in Niamey. Symbols of Social Stratification. Traditionally, aristocratic people were distinguished not by vast differences in wealth or standard of living but by exterior verbal and nonverbal symbols of body, dress, and ornamentation.
These symbols included cultural values emphasizing reserved, dignified conduct such as controlled and indirect speech; bodily signs of ease such as soft hands and long fingers set off by ornate rings; a portly well-nourished body; layered, voluminous cloth and, for men, an elaborately wrapped headdress; and heavy and intricately worked silver and gold jewelry for women.
Certain material items were forbidden to all but the aristocracy. Griots and smith-artisans in these societies were expected to lack reserve, dress less modestly; and say what nobles could not. Throughout the country, however, there were minimal differences among the social strata: Within each group, all spoke the same language, ate similar foods, and lived in housing that, except for chiefs' residences, was not radically different.
The external class and caste symbols, however, necessitated a relatively more comfortable lifestyle conspicuous consumption for high-status person.
These distinctions also included greater monopoly over resources such as land, livestock, and trade. Despite these differences, there has always been the possibility of mobility. Today many external symbols no longer correspond to social origins, and wealth does not always coincide with prestigious status.
Niger is a republic, with recent alternations between military and transitional parliamentary governments. In principle, a president is elected for a five-year term through universal suffrage. The next elections were scheduled for the years legislative and presidential. Leadership and Political Officials. The national government is headed by an appointed prime minister and the Council of Ministers.
Local governmental organization is based on seven departementsor provinces, headed by prefects similar to governorsthirty-two arrondissementsand one hundred fifty communes. The first president was overthrown by a military coup because of widespread discontent with the government's failure to distribute drought relief effectively from to After the adoption of a new constitution in Decemberin early Niger conducted its first multiparty presidential and legislative elections since independence.
The constitution provided for a semi-presidential system of government in which executive power is shared by the president of the republic, who is elected by universal suffrage for a five-year term and a prime minister named by the president. The unicameral legislature has eighty-three deputies elected for a five-year term under a system of proportional representation.
After a coup inthe head of the presidential guard, Daouda Malam Wanke, was named president and head of the National Council for Reconciliation. This coalition was expected to lead Niger for a nine-month transition period. Following this period, Tandja Mamadou was sworn in as president, returning Niger to civilian rule.
Social Problems and Control. Although the main security forces consist of the army, the gendarmerie rural paramilitary policeand the national police, there are alternative formal and informal mechanisms for dispute settlement and social control, particularly in rural areas. In the towns, there is a secular court system based on French law.
Civil and criminal cases that do not involve security-related acts are tried publicly. Defendants have the right to be present, confront witnesses, examine the evidence against them, present evidence of their own, and choose a lawyer. Minors and defendants charged with crimes carrying a sentence of ten years or more are eligible to be defended at public expense. Defendants and prosecutors may appeal a verdict to the Court of Appeals and then to the Supreme Court. The Court of Appeals reviews questions of fact and law, while the Supreme Court reviews only the application of the law.
Cases involving divorce or inheritance may be heard by a traditional chief or a customary court. Customary courts in large towns and cities are headed by a legal practitioner who is advised by an assessor who is knowledgeable about the society's traditions. The judicial actions of chiefs and customary courts are not formally regulated. Cases that are not resolved by chiefs or customary courts can be appealed to the formal court system. While there are no official religious courts, in the countryside plaintiffs first take disputes to local councils of Islamic scholars, elders, and chiefs, who arbitrate many local land disputes, marital conflicts, and thefts, sometimes referring to Koranic law.
Additional, informal means of social control include gossip, praise songs, and certain "pollution beliefs" involving theft and divine retribution. The president is commander in chief of the armed forces. There is a two-year period of conscription. Most of the workforce, however, is employed in subsistence agriculture and herding and artisan work and is not unionized or salaried.
The USTN and the Teachers Union have stated policies of political autonomy, but all unions have informal ties to political parties. There are a hundred or more trade associations. There is also an office approximating Social Security for retiring functionaries. Nongovernmental Organizations and Other Associations The vast majority of people are more affected by customary informal organizations or foreign aid organizations, such as insurance-like pooling and "community chests," and by religious-sponsored charity or tithing.
Although women traditionally do not take part in official political decision making and there is some division of men's and women's worlds, the local cultural ideology defines these conditions as complementary rather than unequal. Men tend to be characterized as the breadwinners and perform labor in the "public" and "official" domain as opposed to the "private and domestic" and "unofficial" domains. Men tend to travel more widely than women to do migrant labor and on caravan expeditions.
Women tend to cook, act as the primary caregivers for children and aged persons, and do domestic work such as crushing An aerial view of Agadez. Architecture reflects traditional regional and sedentarized-nomadic differences. In rural areas, women perform arduous physical labor such as gathering firewood hand-processing food, fetching water from the well, and building and tending cooking fires.
Semi-nomadic women construct the tent, whereas men construct the adobe mud houses. Those Haussa women who are in seclusion can participate in economic activities covertly by sending cooked snacks and crafted items with children for sale at markets. Women can participate in economic activities covertly, from within their compound walls, by sending cooked snacks and crafted items with children for sale at markets. Women may become respected herbal healers. The Relative Status of Women and Men.
Inthe government appointed five women to ministerial positions in a twenty-eight-member cabinet.
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Women's organizations and other human rights groups conduct educational campaigns to increase the participation of women in the official political process. The traditional practice of husbands' casting their wives' proxies was widely used during the National Assembly elections and the first round of presidential elections. Human rights groups have tried to eliminate this practice.
Despite variations among the different ethnic groups in the traditional status of women, women do not enjoy official equal legal status with men nationally. While the head of household has certain legal rights, divorced or widowed women, even those with children, are not considered the heads of the households. Women's rights groups have been attempting to strengthen women's rights in inheritance, land tenure, and child custody and to end the practice of repudiation, which permits a husband to obtain an immediate divorce without having further responsibility for his wife and children.
There is a small but increasing number of women professionals. In some regions, particularly the towns, domestic violence against women and children is widespread. Families often intervene, however, and divorce can be granted for physical abuse. In some towns, prostitution is the only economic alternative for a woman who wants to leave her husband.
Traditional Marriage In Nigeria
Some women own property: Recently, there have been isolated incidents of violence against women for religious reasons. Marriage, Family, and Kinship Marriage. First marriages are almost always arranged by the parents in both rural and urban communities.
Usually, there are no "forced" unions; A nomadic teacher uses a rock as a blackboard during a lesson at a temporary school near Arlit. Traditional parental preferences for social stratum endogamy and cousin marriage are breaking down in the towns.
Men can have up to four wives, according to Islamic law. Not all men have the economic means to practice polygyny, which is slightly more prevalent in towns. There are tons of girls out there. Why try to hook up with a married woman? If your excuse for hooking up with her is because she is having problems home, if you guys get together and you have problems just like married couples do, she will probably try to hook up with somebody else.
How would you like that?
What goes around comes around. You better believe dat. Also your reference to the husband "neglecting" or "physically abusing" the wife is none of your business? Refer her to counselors that can help them. Stay out of their home and their issues. Are you interested in helping her fix her problems or are you just trying to satisfy your selfish wants?
How do you think your relationship with her will affect her relationship with her husband if the husband finds out about your illicit and despicable relationship. She's probably not even trying hard enough to save her marriage because of you my loverman Can't wait to hear more flimsy reasons why you are doing this or contemplating doing it? Oga Dauda, some married men do have extra-m relationships based on these same reasons and its cool with everybody as long as he keeps the mistress at arms length from madam.
So why can't women enjoy this same freedom? Ok make we put the question the other way round, How will you feel dating a married man? Talking about counselling, Oga Dauda, what if the girl falls in love with the counsellor abi make counsellor fall for client -2 ge 4?
Dating Married Women by abuguy64 m: Believe me,it is not the best relationship to be engaged with a married person. The sex may be good,the experience thrilling,BUT man,the fear of being caught and you eventually get caught! Long ago,I got involved, I still wake up in cold sweats sometimes when I remember that period in my life.
There are some parts of my state capital,I walk with dread,because I know there is someone out there,who is still looking for a way to pay me back for my evil deed! A word is enough for the wise! Ohher excuse was that her husband was no longer interested in her,but they are still married and have been for more than 20 years! Dating Married Women by stormz m: I no get problem and I am not making excuses for them, I'm just talking about weird things that happen these days and reasons people give why such things happen.
Kasaliyaro, when I talked about referring her to a counselor, I meant a professional counselor that knows and understands that carrying on a relationship with a client is unprofessional.
A counselor that gets involved with a client is compromised and would probably not give good counsel. It's just a wrong move. Nothing under the sun can justify any relationship of this kind. Dating Married Women by stevebk m: It is not nice to date a married woman, think of wat wud happen to u when u get married, things has its way of gettin back.
Dating Married Women by babymine f: